There are secrets to parenting. People much smarter than I have written great books on the subject. I get it wrong a lot more often than I care to admit. But I’ve learned a few things from Kim that have showed up lately. I won’t dive into everything that I’m learning, but here’s a start.
Good relationships are at the heart of everything, including raising your children. With that in mind:
1. Be intentional. Not much good ever happens by accident. Oh sure, there’s penicillin and such. But if your aim is good rapport with your kids, you better chart a course and develop a plan of action.
2. Learn to listen. Your children probably fill your house with loads of blahblahblah about everything from Thomas the Train to OneDirection/Pretty Little Liars/superheroes. At least that’s how it is in our house. But if I don’t listen, ask questions, and develop a genuine interest in their interests, I’ll likely miss the moment when they need to open up and talk about heart stuff. That’d be tragic.
3. Be an encourager. Sure, there are lots of times when you’ll have to be the bad cop, have to drop the hammer, have to take away the keys/celly/sleepover. But if you can identify the things that your kids are good at and call those out, you’ll gain a lot of relational ground. I want my kids to know that I’m their biggest fan.
4. Spend time. More than anything, your children need you. Turn off the electronic devices. Play a game together. Go for a walk/run/ride. Pick up a hobby. In a world where so many things compete for the heart of your children, the person who spends the most time usually wins. Create some memories and traditions.
5. Lead your children spiritually. That’s a major role. You don’t have to know it all, and you can start small. We spend about 15 minutes each morning reading from a great children’s Bible and praying for a country of the world. Your children are looking for you to set the tone, and you can do it!
Parenting is one of the toughest roles we’ll ever have. It’s also one of the best. It’s worth doing well, worth getting better at.
And with that, here’s us at the start and close of the school day. It was a good day.
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